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Snooping on one’s partner is always a major issue in relationships. This can be done by checking your partners call logs and messages, stalking your partner especially on social networks(read more about networking here), checking their Facebook wall , time line or DM on twitter, checking their Instagram page for the posts they like and comment on constantly. You can also snoop by wanting to know all the moves of your partner or making all means to be everywhere they are at every hour of the day. The truth is, snooping either makes a relationship stronger or wrecks it.
Reasons Why Partners Snoop
- Lack of Trust
People snoop because they fear their partner is cheating (read more on why men cheat) and hiding things from them. Some people are in the habit of snooping around their partner’s phone just because they believe that this is the only way they can find out if their partner is unfaithful or not.
- Curiosity
Curiosity sets in when a partner guides around his or her phone always or when there is sudden usage of phone locks and passwords. These sudden actions will make the other partner wanting to know the reasons behind the change of actions.
This is another reason for snooping. People get insecure in their relationships especially when they have had experiences of their partners cheating in the past. This will makes them snoop because they are scared of previous experiences reoccurring. Snooping around shows a sign of insecurity and may be very tempting especially when you feel something is not right anymore in your relationship.
- Paranoia
Paranoia can also be a major reason why people snoop. A paranoid partner finds it difficult to trust or believe things said by the other partner. Snooping then becomes an option for such people as they feel that is the only way they can really know what their partner has been up to as opposed to asking them.
- Lack of Communication
There are cases where partners no longer have the connection as it used to be or when there is a gap or distance (read more about long distance relationship here) between them. Talking about the reasons for disconnection might not help as each partner feels they will not be honest with each other, thereby resulting to snooping.
The People That Snoop
Both men and women in relationships snoop on their partners. In fact, in contradiction to the belief that women snoop on their partners more than men in relationships, various studies have shown that men are more likely to snoop than women. The difference between them is that women admits to snooping and confront their partners while the men hardly admit to the act.
Advantages of Snooping
One of the advantages is that it may give the proof needed to confirm if the spouse is faithful or not, especially in cases where the other partner keep avoiding the discussion relating to infidelity. Also, apart from having proofs needed, snooping also helps in making decisions whether to stay, leave or to be fully committed in a relationship. This act also helps in discovering the hidden lifestyles of a partner, such as the involvement in some form of illegal and dirty activities which were never made open in the relationship. Snooping can get you out of a toxic relationship because it makes you to know the things your partner may never have told you.
Disadvantages of Snooping
These days, the whole idea of your partner leaving some hints and rapid change in attitude if he or she is cheating (read more on why women cheat) may not really be effective anymore. This is because people have gotten smarter overtime, thus, one may not get any hints from their attitude that will show if they are cheating or not.
On the flip side, snooping may not be the best thing to do in a relationship because the things you may find on your partners phone or on their social networks account may not really be what you think it is. You may misinterpret something you saw or make a mountain out of a molehill and then take a drastic decision which may cost you your relationship and you end having regrets. Par adventure your partner finds out you have been snooping on him or her, it will make the partner feel you do not trust them, which may make them doubt you too.
Trust Your Partner
Trust is a very important criterion in a relationship. If you do not trust your partner, the relationship may only last for a while before it hits rock bottom. So if there is trust in your relationship, you would not even see the need to snoop around your partner.
Give Your Partner Privacy
Furthermore, privacy is a big deal in a relationship. We all need and deserves to have our privacies and spaces, so also your spouse. This is another reason why you should not snoop on your partner. Also, if you do not like your partner snooping around your phone, then you do not do the same to them. Respect, they say is reciprocal. The irony of it is, if you snoop and you do not find anything, that does not mean they are faithful, they may have deleted all possible traces.
Clearly, we can see that there are more disadvantages than advantages of snooping . If your relationship has not felt the same for a while or if you just have the instincts that something is not right, talk to your partner about your fears ,the changes and signs you noticed. If things remain the same after a while, it will be left to you to decide whether or not you feel the need to still be with them. Communication and trust is very important in any relationship instead of snooping around them.
Good luck
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